How do you make up your moral codes? – a close friend of mine with whom I’ve been working the past 12 months asked me. He said he got curious, while watching how I treat and interact with customers and co-workers.
I don’t think my moral codes are that strict, or nowhere close to being perfect. I love outlaw shows like Breaking Bad or La Casa de Moneda – the Spanish Netflix romantic crime show. My dream role is Cersei Lannister – okay I might be losing my credibility here as you’re reading this… 😂 BUT, if this means anything to you – I’ve never stolen anything in my life – nor done shop lifting ever when I was little. (My friends were always stealing erasers and pens in bookstores, but I never did!) Nope, never stolen no one either, haha. But I sometimes pick up trash which people littered at beaches or on the streets. So my friend got curious. How do I do that when no one is watching you? Cuz I hadn’t no idea I was being watched by him!
I would say my codes started to make up when I was in Catholic elementary school. The nuns and teachers told us little souls – they get us at such early ages- “Jesus and Angels are always watching you, so always be good.”
(Now I told you I’ve never stolen things, but I wasn’t a total angel. I was a naughty little one. I used to fight with boys a lot in second grade. I even had my karate chop moves. I would beat up boys who were bullies, and got in trouble with them often.)
While I was in my Catholic elementary school, my moral codes were determined by what would angels or God think of my actions. However, after a while, as I got older, I grew apart from religious values. I even started to hate it when people do something because “that is what Jesus would do”. That didn’t feel genuine to me at all. So instead, I started to do thing that would make me feel good about myself. I do the right thing because if I don’t, I know I would regret it later. I decided to be good for my own self esteem. Do the right thing because you want to, because you genuinely, truly want to do something good.
I asked my friend how about him? How does HE make choices? At that moment he just found out he was having a baby. So, for him, he told me, he decided to do the right things because he wants his child to be proud of him; that he doesn’t want to let her down.
Doing the things that are right because you genuinely want to, because it looks right to you, or because you want to make your loved ones proud – and it will lead you to loving yourself and having higher self esteem. Everyone wins! 🤗
Thank you for reading,
Until next time – stay happy!